My first present on the day of my birthday was a bag of delightful Starbuck's coffee

God's Boys will be good boys!

Creature Comforts from home

I crushed the grains in my coffee grain mill and enjoyed one of my most delightful morning rituals. I have learned to really enjoy coffee in the morning. Somehow the added chore of crushing the beans and smelling the fragrance seems to add to the delight of it.

I often go to a coffee shop or a gas station to get a "quick fix", but it isn't the same. I enjoy the slow process of watching the clear water turn into the coffee in my cup. I enjoy sipping it and think of something else, I might flavor this with, to share it with non coffee drinkers.

Sometimes I make a jello out of it and eat it myself later, but there isn't anybody else who enjoys the flavor of a sweetened cup of coffee like I do. I really like it and I am so grateful for your sweet gift this 57th birthday! You can't know how much.

If you are a spanking kind of father, one day. You might relate to this...

Discussions with Joshy have been about the effectiveness of a females influence on the spanking process.   His mommy and grand mommy defer to dad.  He said. I can't wait til I am the boss can whip whomever I want.  His behavior said this.  Evidently he gets the impression that this is the easiest of the jobs.

Perhaps that overused phrase that his is going to hurt me more than it hurts you, wasn't really a lie.   Perhaps it was giving the correct impression that it isn't as easy as it looks to decide which spankings to give and when to show mercy.   The fact that parents live under authority has not sunk in to his ambitious little mind.  He said I want to be the one to spank everybody in so many words.   

Anger that we must submit to authority is normal and more and more prevalent as we socialize in a world where most children don't live under authority at all.  Who do mom and dad answer to?  That is the most important lesson to teach to young minds who wonder why do they have to live under authority?

Why indeed?  Fathers provoke not! Means that we must analyze the culture as well as the environments we place our children and explain some of the disparities that they see.   Scripture answers these quandaries.  We would emphasize the loving part of the verse about sap kings so that they would be as convinced of Gods intention for these spankings as we were.   The speed with which they were thrust into a secular anti family educational environment didn't give us the opportunity to pick up the pieces of some of the anger and confusion that erupted in our change of pace.  Dad was the boss and mom was the educator.  And then they were couped up in pens with rabble rousers where there was no instruction and no discipline.   That is what happens when you try to follow Jesus in rearing your children.  That is what they saw.  The little ones who were raised in the system completely have no spiritual bias whatsoever.  That is sad!

Engaging our children on their perceptions of the discipline isn't soft.  It is  amazingly empowering.  The image of my dear child in thought Horatio Nelson going to get the birch rod for his spanking and knowing that his infraction would merit just that, wasn't just for past generations it is what causes the logical portion of the mind to become empowered.  Here this young genius is exploring his mind to find a world where he can be king.

Isn't that amazing.  I am it in yet, but when I overthrow my father you will be the first one I spank, Mrs. Jayne.  I have been on that list for my own children and that is the best place to be, in my estimations.  It mean. It means that I represent the wall of right and wrong that he must knock down to get to do just what he wants.  I like representing that for him in his conscience.  or consciousness...  i am sorry for the mommy who never gets to play that pretend role with her children.   

How Position in the Family might affect your directing of others...

God's Boys will be good boys!

I heartily suggest you read the Birth Order Book, by Kevin Lehman: so we can talk about it

The Cry of Missing Infancy...

The cry of missing infancy

Malia had a cry that was half a tantrum, for having been corrected and half a missing infancy.  Being in the infant room there is a yearning to return to the familiar condition of being cared for.  If they are not impressed upon that they must serve others, they will continue to use the resources of the family without care. 

Caidence seemed alerted to her problem and quickly gave comforting pats to her little friend.  We aren't babies anymore, the pats seemed to say.

Caidence has an ambitious spirit and her eyes are always looking for the next hill to climb, while Malia is the more romantic of the two.  She is nurturing fond memories and storing them up.

The sharing drills were funny between them.   THey don't fully understand the drill yet.  Having a beginning and an end of sharing time might help their understanding a bit.  If a little princess doesn't learn the reality of disappointment she won't be able to judge the weight of her words upon others.   

Everyone has to submit to a higher authority.  It hurts when you don't get your way.  You might cry, you mustn't have a tantrum.  Submitting to people is of far less consequences than submitting to God.  Gods ways are far above our ways and his judgments past finding out, but there are eternal consequences.  Because of this truth, I believe spankings of greatest importance to the most affluent and Royal, to whom their words will have the greatest consequence to others.   Avoid Hell, at all cost is the expression.  When we spank them soundly, we give them a standard of pain that they would only inflict when absolutely necessary.

I would have spanked Malia, were she my child for not wanting to listen to Ms Janet and disrespectful, exaggerated expression.  I might have been wrong, to have placed upon her my impression.  I don't think so though.   Her mother is right to use the term, Get in control!  That is the goal.  Getting the emotions in control.  Sometimes in daycare they spin out of control and all of the emotions ie. Missing mommy and anger of the situation and the occasion which caused the problem get all squeezed together and can't be put into words.  More understanding is needed to untangle the emotional element from the conflict itself, or no lessons can be really learned.  They are conflagrated together into a mesh of "I miss mommy".

Where is Gollum in my life?

Is he inside or outside of myself?

The internal inclinations to sins that would take you down into a dehumanized existence.  The deep resources of the soul that takes even the good food of Gods word and seeks to wrest it in your soul to your own demise.  Gollum sits there and seeks to reason away the word of God that feeds life and make it a noose of death.  

Some people might take you there, by their reasonings outside of the Word.  More often it is your own heart, which because of lack of Godly fellowship and correct teachings links ancient heresies together and tries to consume it for life profit.  It is unfair for consumption and should be reproved and forsaken immediately, or sad is the state of the heart.

Dont get stuck attempting to work out the riddles of unbelievers hearts!

My Grandma Hanst and me...

A student of 106

Mu had legends attached to her name.  They are trying to canonize her and I somewhat agree.. But, growing up, I wasn't that impressed with the grown ups who were her children or the foster children.  I was their very junior and I simply couldn't stand them,except for Aunt Helen.  I am impressed now that I have inadvertently attempted to imitate her faith, so to speak and haven't accomplished much in the process.  I analyzed and criticized the whole lot of them in my mind, for this and that flaw and wrong emphasis that I thought they had passed along to us.

My mother was considered the black sheep, for having embraced male headship and leadership in the home.  My father recognized her support for his leadership of the children.  There is hardly a time when I ask my mother that she doesn't remind me to defer to the tradition of the in laws. That is how we were raised and that is what my mother says all the time.  Let the children have all of the benefits of their fathers experience.  I hate that about her, sometimes.

She was raised completely maternal.  Mother was the matriarch and she was completely unchallenged by any man. Pop was gone just about, by the time I met Mu.  But I don't think it would have been any different had he been the father of all those children, instead of just one.  The matriarchy was insisted upon and no man could challenge it.

My parents conviction on the subject isolated them from both sides of the family.  Feminism was completely the culture of my extended family and no man could insist on anything without ridicule.  I know he didn't just open his mouth to try to insist on something was the laughed off response.    It was hard to respect the men, because emir paultry attempts were thought infantile.  I don't know if that was the culture more broadly, as African Americans, but that was the gospel according to Mu.

They were impeccably dressed and hair straightened and braided to the tightest inch on he scalp.  This was the highest conviction.  More than anything else people must look their best at all times.  My parents rejected this philosophy first and for most.  We looked how we looked.  Getting the most skills under the belt, as early in the morning was more important than spending all day doing hair and pressing clothes.  It wasn't playing.  It was skill building.  Boddens get ready quickly and out to do stuff.  Getting the things done is of more importance than how you look doing it.

106 had as many children in it as we did.  They played sports and danced and sang, like we did, but they looked amazing when they did it.  They were the standard that everybody else wanted to be.

24 Today! Halleluia What a Savior!

God's Boys will be good boys!

Saying goodbye to the Year of Pi!

God's Boys will be good boys!

Psalm 110:5 The Lord at thy right hand shall strike through kings in the day of his wrath. Psalm 110:6 He shall judge among the heathen, he shall fill the places with the dead bodies; he shall wound the heads over many countries.

I love having gotten to know you until your 23rd year, whatever else comes next!On the weekend of Baby Ben's 23rd birthday, I watched Guess Who's Coming To Dinner. I was amazed that all of that was an expression of what had happened in the 23rd year of their only daughter's life. I was in pain, because I couldn't hold my eldest son and enjoy such blooming and growth. This year has been just a blessing of receiving the beauty of seeing a man become a man. Thank you for sharing such growth and beauty with us.

Harassment talks

About our discussion of not being overcome by evil:

Harassment discussions and learning the things acceptable and unacceptable in the workforce there are considerations on both sides.  Women must be accommodated.  The Bible says they are the weaker vessel and you will find that to be true whether they accept the fact or not.  Some are weak in body, but all are weak in spirit.   Women often need a pep talk for encouragement.  Men see to always receive the pep talk, women, not so much.

Don't forget to take these into consideration.

Fathers, provoke not your children to discouragement!

God's Boys will be good boys!

I am in a quandry in this regard. Is any use of the rod provoking to discouragement? I watch the children who have never had a rod on their backsides, seem to rule the day. They are kings and queens of their regimes. The diligent father seems to crush the spirit of children, in today's world. Any expression of masculinity is shunned and exploited as the reasons for discouragements. We have no real moderations these days. It is all or nothing.

I see these dear children who are blessed with wisdom and prudence early because of a diligent father and they are the spectacle everywhere they go. Why do they act like that? Everybody wonders. Because they have a father who is impacting their lives and most other children don't. It looks odd. They need to be put in a community where they have other children who have both parents also or they will become crushed. Children are resilient, I hear often. Still, I know alot of discouraged children, who can't find the impetus to get up. The system seems to rejoice in their demise.

I hope not!

Becoming an Outdoorsman!

God's Boys will be good boys!

Next week you start your new job at a parks department.

We are looking forward to the new observations that you will have from being outdoors for most of the day. You are bound to learn something about the care and keeping of the yard. I hope you can help me some, when you do. You are bound to learn about your own likes and dislikes, in terms of weather conditions and wildlife, in the suburbs. Working with other people is always a learning environment and I am sure that your anticipation of that part of the job has some great expectations, as well as concerns.

Outdoorsmen have a reputation of being foul of mouth, at least. I hope you don't learn those kinds of ways. It is hard to be a winsome expression of masculinity in the midst of the foul of speech. You may have to endure some of it, for a while in order to win the hearts and say a word that may have any impact. Should you wish to win their souls.

He that winneth souls is wise

Learning to bait your spiritual hook, may take some time. I wish you great success and great learning.

I always learned never to say "What" to your mother!

God's Boys will be good boys!

I didn't impress those kinds of serious verbal corrections on my own children. But, I would hope that you would impress your children that it is most important to know the different tones of voice and the different words that are "no-no's" to authority and elders. What, has become the kind of question that I limit in my communication to anyone, but on occasion, it is necessary to let someone know that you are not my mother, in my own mind and to the person. So they call me and I say "what!" Just like that. Ordinarily, if someone calls me, I say, Yes?, or Huh?, or excuse me?, or their name.

Other languages have expressions and submissive speech baked into their language. In our English, we have to instruct the Vocative from the Dative cases and the Ablative from the Genitive. So take authority and do not allow your children to condescend to the language deterioration that allows a child to think themselves a peer of their parents and grandparents. If I am alive, I will help you.

Notes from your father's Sunday School lesson, because you missed it. Love

God's Boys will be good boys!

Proverbs by Bridges

Minister Walker Friendship Cafe Sunday School Lesson!

Eating friends : fun seekers Business friends: team players Counsel friends :project workers School friends: learning with Knowing who is trying to manipulate you and why? People watch what you eat...how much...are you greedy in public...? Do people tell you what they observe? Or do they use it to humiliate you and set the parameters? Stay focused on the learning projects above all the other pursuits on every level! That will keep you out of reach of the manipulators! The concept of cyber cookies! saftety procedure cookies! Deceptive friends!

Stress relievers...

Vs.17 who you should never envy...sinners...people who are characterized by their behaviors! Proverbs 23:21 KJVS

[21] For the drunkard and the glutton shall come to poverty: and drowsiness shall clothe a man with rags. How to make your momma happy

Vs25 Some things not to get caught up I. Even in the little dab will do ya's! Why are most people that you see on the side of the road . In a woeful circumstance...

Proverbs 23:29 KJVS [29] Who hath woe? who hath sorrow? who hath contentions? who hath babbling? who hath wounds without cause? who hath redness of eyes? Now it is a secret place to be...that is more dangerous!

Proverbs 23:32 KJVS [32] At the last it biteth like a serpent, and stingeth like an adder.

Ps 119:how can a young man....

Happy Sabbath Day!

God's Boys will be good boys!